FLATTERY

DIVIDES THE SOUL

 

Recognizing Flattery

 

     Flattery takes root through lies or exaggerations.  The flatterer lacks truth and sincerity, he or she is snared by the transgression of their lips, and they seek to ensnare others.  Praise is righteous and appropriate to give, but excessive or insincere praise is flattery and destructive to the soul.  We either painstakingly avoid the hazards of flattery, or risk being ensnared by the person who flatters.

 

Hebrew words for "flattering" or flattery"

Cheleq  -portion, part, flattering, flattery, inheritance, partaker  #2506

Chalaq  -flattering, smooth, smoother  #2509

Chelqah  -portion, parcel, piece, field, flattering, plat, part, flattery, ground,

places, smooth, smooth things (comes from Cheleq)  #2513

Kanah  -flattering titles, surname  #3655

Strongs or Thayers #

 

Job 17:5 "He that speaks Cheleq (flattery) to his friends, even the eyes of his children shall fail."

 

Proverbs 26:28 "A lying tongue hates those that are afflicted by it; and a Chalaq (flattering) mouth works ruin"

 

Proverbs 6:23-24 "For the commandment is a lamp; and the Torah is light; and reproofs of instruction are the way of life:  To keep you from the evil woman, from the Chelqah (flattery) of the tongue of a strange woman."

 

Job 32:22 "For I know not to give Kanah (flattering titles); in so doing my maker would soon take me away."

    

     A flatterer likes to tell people what they want to hear, like putting hooks into the weak areas of the soul to pull them in the direction they desire.  Popular terms, people, names, "buzz phrases", clichés, special interests or needs can be used by the flatterer to entice his or her victim.  The flatterer knows the terms and values which are held in high esteem by the potential victim and pretends to be entrusted with these same values, but some unwittingly make themselves targets for the flatterer.   The flatterer also thinks very highly of himself, he fantasizes and flatters himself but pride will bring him very low.

 

Proverbs 27:2 "Let another man praise you, and not your own mouth; a stranger, and not your own lips."

 

     Certainly, we all appreciate attractive clothes, refinement, nice fashion, intelligence, sophistication, talent and wealth, it is stimulating to converse with those well traveled, those who have experienced "life to the fullest".  Certainly, all these things YHWH has given us to enjoy, His Blessings are certainly manifold, but we are meant to enjoy all these things in community within the values and governance of the Mashiyach and through the Wisdom of Torah.  If a person praises us for anything that we cannot be thankful for from YHWH, then it is flattery not praise.  Praise is done in righteousness and is acknowledgement by others for taking righteous action.

 

     Indulging oneself in extravagance is a form of self-flattery.  YHWH is the most extravagant of all Givers, He has demonstrated His extravagant love towards us by choosing Mashiyach to suffer for us.  For souls to acknowledge what He has done and then use it to justify acquiring material blessings is flattery of the flesh.  We can easily believe that YHWH wants to give us all the desires of our heart if we look at the price He paid for our Redemption.  He has most certainly blessed us by providing for our salvation, but one could easily flatter oneself or be flattered by someone by using what He has done to pursue "material abundance".  The desires of our hearts must be measured according to His Word, Teachings and Promises.  One example of those using the "authority of the Word" to reach their desires is the indiscriminate use of "the prayer of Yahbetz (Jabez)".

 

1 Chronicles 4:10  "And Jabez called on the Elohim of Israel, saying, Oh that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my coast, and that your hand might be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that it may not grieve me!  And Elohim granted him that which he requested."

 

     By overemphasizing the desire for individual blessings and stretching the Word of YHWH to suit these desires it's easy to become entrapped by flattery.  Many stumble by thinking that YHWH has not fulfilled all the desires of their hearts, they blame YHWH for not being their big "sugar daddy".  Some begin to think YHWH doesn't love them, that He doesn't care or even exist otherwise they would be given more, they see that even those who don't profess to live according to the Faith seem to get what all their desires.  A flattering spirit says, if you are a good Jew, Netzarim, Believer or a Christian then you should receive much more.

 

Genesis 3:4-5 "And the serpent said unto the woman, You shall not surely die:  For Elohim knows that in the day you eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and you shall be as gods, knowing good and evil."

 

     On a community level we recognize the importance of designated offices for our leaders and we utilize titles such as, Doctor, Minister, Counselor, Pastor, Worship Leader, Rabbi, Board Member, Chairman, President, Mayor etc. to describe the office and/or qualifications.  These offices carry the respect of the community and are necessary to provide order, structure and facilitate leadership.  Those who hold positions in leadership are instrumental for developing the values and personality of the community, they represent their community to the outside world.  However there is also a potential for those with influential leadership positions to become "self-important" and flatter themselves or become targets for flattery.

 

Job 32:21-22  "Let me not, I pray you, nasa (regard) any man's person, neither let me give flattering titles unto man. For I know not to give flattering titles; for in so doing my maker would soon take me away."

 

     Job prays that he not "lift up, bear, carry, take, regard any man's person", or give "flattering titles unto man", Job is talking about not stroking the prideful flesh.  He is not speaking against the office or titles of men because YHWH appointed the titles of Cohanim, Neviim, Leviim and Melekim for the purpose of distinguishing them for positions and responsibilities.  The adversary of YHWH directs much of his work towards YHWH's appointed leaders to tempt them into being flattered or flattering themselves. 

 

Matthew 20:25-28  "But Y'shua called them unto him, and said, You know that the princes of the Heathen exercise dominion over them, and they that are great exercise authority upon them.  But it shall not be so among you: but whosoever will be great among you, let him be your minister;  And whosoever will be chief among you, let him be your servant:  Even as the Son of man came not to be ministered to, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many."

 

Those who take positions in leadership become targets for the flatterers, the Mashiyach Himself had to deal with this.

 

Matthew 19:16-17  "And, behold, one came and said unto him, Good Master, what good thing shall I do, that I may have eternal life?  And he said unto him, Why do you call me good? there is none good but one, that is, YHWH: but if you will enter into life, keep the commandments."

 

Luke 6:46  "And why do you call me, Lord, Lord, and do not the things which I say?"

 

     Those who "preach" to suit their audience are what "men pleasers" or flatterers, but those who speak truth are not as concerned as how people might react as they are about being YHWH's Servants.  When a leader becomes stifled by pressure from others and begins to tailor the teaching to accommodate, he becomes a follower, the Scripture refers to these men as "hirelings".

 

1 Thessalonians 2:3-6 "For our exhortation was not of deceit, nor of uncleanness, nor in guile:  But as we were allowed of Elohim to be put in trust with the Good News, even so we speak; not as pleasing men, but Elohim, which tries our hearts.  For neither at any time did we use flattering words, as you know, nor a cloak of covetousness; Elohim is witness: Nor of men sought we glory, neither of you, nor yet of others, when we might have been burdensome, as the apostles of Mashiyach."

 

Galatians 1:10  "For do I now persuade men, or Elohim? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Mashiyach."

 

     Nations can also be trapped into flattering themselves or being flattered by others:

 

Isaiah 30:8-17 Now go, write it before them in a table, and note it in a book, that it may be for the time to come for ever and ever:  That this is a rebellious people, lying children, children that will not hear the Torah of YHWH:  Which say to the seers, See not; and to the prophets, Prophesy not unto us right things, speak unto us Chelqah (smooth things), prophesy deceits:  Get you out of the way, turn aside out of the path, cause the Holy One of Israel to cease from before us.  Wherefore thus says the Holy One of Israel, Because you despise this word, and trust in oppression and perverseness, and stay thereon:  Therefore this iniquity shall be to you as a breach ready to fall, swelling out in a high wall, whose breaking cometh suddenly at an instant.  And he shall break it as the breaking of the potters' vessel that is broken in pieces; he shall not spare: so that there shall not be found in the bursting of it a sherd to take fire from the hearth, or to take water out of the pit.  For thus says the YHWH Elohim, the Holy One of Israel; In returning and rest shall you be saved; in quietness and in confidence shall be your strength: and you would not.  But you said, No; for we will flee upon horses; therefore shall you flee: and, We will ride upon the swift; therefore shall they that pursue you be swift.  One thousand shall flee at the rebuke of one; at the rebuke of five shall ye flee: till ye be left as a beacon upon the top of a mountain, and as an ensign on an hill.

 

 

Guard Against Flattery

 

     Our fathers Abraham, Yitzak and Ya'akov exemplify those who were called and blessed of YHWH as Covenant Keepers.  Clearly we see in these men a common thread of values far beyond the ordinary values of their day.  First and foremost they had greatness of calling to Keep Covenant, and righteousness of character.

     David began as a shepherd boy, a commoner, not wealthy or famous, but David's greatness was that his Faith in YHWH superseded his own desires.  David was preoccupied by sanctifying the Name of YHWH, he didn't appear to do much "risk analysis" before he went of to meet Goliath, he denied himself, he would rather have died than to continue hearing the enemies of Israel mock the Elohim of Israel.  David's motive was pure, he was ordained of YHWH and chosen to have the victory, and so it is with us who are in the Household of Faith, the ultimate test of our desires is to weigh them in the Mashiyach.  The Spirit of Mashiyach aims to accomplish Righteousness and Truth in the inward parts, when we compare our actions and desires to those of HaMashiyach we will recognize flattery for what it is, and not be entrapped by it.  The desires to increase ourselves will transform into desires to increase the Kingdom of Elohim so we can live together as One Mishpocha (family) in YHWH.

 

"Listen, my beloved brethren, has not Elohim chosen the poor of this world rich in faith,

and heirs of the kingdom which he has promised to them that love him?"

James 2:5

 

Psalm 12

"Help, YHWH; for the Chasid (righteous man) ceases; for the faithful fail from among the children of men. 

They speak vanity every one with his neighbour: with flattering lips and with a double heart do they speak. 

YHWH shall cut off all flattering lips, and the tongue that speaks proud things: 

Who have said, With our tongue will we prevail; our lips are our own: who is Master over us?

For the oppression of the poor, for the sighing of the needy, now will I arise, says YHWH;

I will set him in safety from him that puffs at him.  The words of YHWH are pure words: as silver tried in a furnace of earth, purified seven times.  You shall keep them, O YHWH, You shall preserve them from this generation for ever. 

The wicked walk on every side, when the vilest men are exalted." 

 

Proverbs 18:21 "Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof."

 

Isaiah 50:4 "YHWH Elohim has given me the tongue of the learned, that I should know how to speak a word in season to him that is weary: he wakens me morning by morning, he wakens my ear to hear as the learned."

 

   We shall not give others the authority to flatter us, we shall not flatter others.

 

     When someone flatters us, they are trying to divide us out for themselves, like when the lions divide a weaker animal out from the flock and then kill it.  A flatterer aims to divide us from YHWH and His People, these are not concerned about YHWH's will for our lives is, or His will for their own lives, they want to accomplish their own agendas.  Flattery is carnal thing that can never produce Holy fruit.

 

Proverbs 6:23-26 "For the commandment is a lamp; and the Torah (law) is light; and reproofs of instruction are the way of life: To keep thee from the evil woman, from the flattery of the tongue of a strange woman. Lust not after her beauty in your heart; neither let her take thee with her eyelids. For by means of a whorish woman a man is brought to a piece of bread: and the adulteress will hunt for the precious life." 

 

Psalm 5:8 "For there is no faithfulness in their mouth; their inward part is very wickedness; their throat is an open sepulcher; they flatter with their tongue." 

 

Jeremiah 18:88 "Then said they, Come, and let us devise devices against Jeremiah; for the law shall not perish from the priest, nor counsel from the wise, nor the word from the prophet. Come, and let us smite him with the tongue, and let us not give heed to any of his words." 

 

Psalm 78:37-39 "Nevertheless they did flatter him with their mouth, and they lied unto him with their tongues. For their heart was not right with him, neither were they steadfast in his covenant. But he, being full of compassion, forgave their iniquity, and destroyed them not: yea, many a time turned he his anger away, and did not stir up all his wrath.  For he remembered that they were but flesh; a wind that passes away, and cometh not again." 

 

     Many devastating experiences in private life or business will be avoided by refusing to allow flattery to have a foothold.  Our children adopt the values they see in fathers and mothers, they must learn the dangers of flattery from a very young age or they will be vulnerable to many kinds of abuse.

 

1 Samuel 16:7 "But YHWH said unto Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for YHWH sees not as man sees; for man looks on the outward appearance, but YHWH looks on the heart."

 

Proverbs 14:15 "The simple believes every word: but the prudent man looks well to his going."

 

Expose Flattery for What it is

 

Make distinctions between what is praise and what is flattery.

Use the Authority of the Word to expose the dangers of flattery regardless of what scale it is on.

Flattery is evidence of hasatan working to manipulate others, it's the language of the destroyer.

 

Stop Flattery

 

     It is far easier to stop flattery before it gets a foothold.

 

 "Open rebuke is better than secret love" Proverbs 27:5

 

Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight,

O YHWH, my strength, and my redeemer.  Psalm 19:14

 

Let all schmoozing be Sanctified in HaMashiyach

and may our Conversation be Holy and without gossip or flattery.

 

Shalom U'Brechot,

Baruch Ben Daniel

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